Elixir: My Cooking. not a magical potion in any shape or form.

imagevia Daily Prompt: Elixir

I had no idea what that word was. So I googled it. Magic potions. Okay? Well, I get called a witch doctor all the time because I use essential oils, does that count for magic potions? No? Ha! They work. I swear it. I’m still here and so are both of my kids. So they must. So anyways…

I love cooking. I am HORRIBLE at cooking. Things are always asking for recipes and measurements and stuff. Wellllll, I just don’t like being told to what to do. I’m always messing up dinner, which is unfortunate because I have to cook for 3 other human beings. My 7 year old has been a vegetarian for 4 years and I am pretty sure it’s all my fault. It’s like I’m a witch with a huge cauldron and my family watches me with disgust as I toss things like troll fingers and weasel eyes in. It kind of really hurts my feelings.

I try. I really do, but somehow it’s always a disaster. I just don’t get it.

I have really bad luck in the kitchen also. One time I burnt Ramen Noodles. No joke. I put the noodles in a bowl and put them in the microwave and they started on fire. Forgot the water. That was in highschool. One time I learnt the hard way that you can’t put metal in the microwave. That was also in highschool for those of you judging me. It seems it’s always something. Like yesterday my boyfriend told me I couldn’t fry potatoes in ranch dressing. Don’t tell me what to brew in my kettle bro. I know you’d eat dog poop if I fried it with some jalapeños and covered it in pepper.

I guess this post is more of a rant. I needed a good rant today, so I’m glad I had no idea what Elixir meant. This post is also pretty pointless now that I look back on it. Welcome to my blog, haha. You’ll see a lot of pointless shit.

Oh, and my boyfriend ate like a truck load of the spaghetti I made with the weird salami I found in the back of the fridge. I was too lazy to thaw out any hamburger. Just goes to show, if you brew it, they will eat it.


2 thoughts on “Elixir: My Cooking. not a magical potion in any shape or form.

  1. I’ve done the same thing with Ramen… it was when I was in college going off of maybe 2-3 hours of sleep between working a double shift and working on a term paper. I’ve also exploded foil in the microwave (foil=metal paper). I’ve also burnt water… I put a pot of water on for tea and forgot about it. I came back and the bottom of the pot was charred. Not my finest moments…

    Liked by 1 person

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